I don’t know about you but I feel life has been throwing a few different curve balls at me recently. Actually the last year has probably been the most intense that I have experienced in a long time. There have been so many changes both personally and in the world. When times are tough or challenging we usually feel the need to feel more in control by holding onto or over managing things. But as much as we want to believe we have control over the situations we are in or the events happening to us this isn’t often the case. However, we do have the ability to choose how we wish to react to events. We can either fight the situation that we are in or after taking necessary action, go with the flow and allow things to play out.
As an example I recently moved from London to Bath. I was fortunate to find a good tenant and during this time contracted with a real estate company to manage the property. Well as it turns out this arrangement ended up being a big mistake with none of the agreed services being carried out from day 1. After a number of frustrations I’d had enough and asked for my contract to be cancelled immediately. The real estate agent indicated that I had to serve 3 months notice and would be liable to pay this. As you can imagine I was furious and set about finding out my rights. In addition to being asked to pay for absolutely zero service, I received no further responses to my emails requesting a different solution. I became a bit obsessed with fighting the situation and I started losing sleep over it. However during this time I kept having subtle thoughts to let go and to not let the problem worry me but as you could imagine I was finding it difficult advice to follow.
Well after a few days of feeling angry, annoyed and frustrated I started to listen to the gentle voice within which was telling me to let go and surrender. That knew that whatever happened everything would be okay. It went against everything I wanted to do but after not seeing the results I wanted I decided to listen and follow the advice. I sent a prayer to the universe and asked for support in letting go of this issue and prayed for the highest outcome for everyone involved.
I then decided to send a final email to the real estate agent reiterating my case and requesting a refund for all the fees that I had paid. I also made a commitment to myself that I wasn’t going to consciously think about the issue anymore. Thoughts did come and go but I just let them flow in and out, letting them be there and acknowledging them without necessarily reacting to them. Well within a day or so I heard back from the real estate agent who apologised for the bad service I had been given and offered a free service for 3 months to try and make up for everything that had happened with the right to cancel without notice if I wasn’t happy with the service. That certainly went beyond the result I was after and I hadn’t done anything after sending the email other than surrender to the situation and trust that things would work out.
This is just one example out of many which have come to me as reminders this year to trust and surrender to a situation. I’ve found that once we have taken the necessary action to try and resolve a situation there’s no point in mulling on it any further. I also believe that by trying to hold onto something we somehow get in the way of the situation resolving itself naturally. We fear that we won’t like the outcome and so hold onto the issue trying to make it fit our version of the right solution. But when I look back on the events in my life I have found that they have always worked out for the best even though at the time I wanted things to turn out differently.
Do you recognise this feeling of holding on or trying to control a situation and the emotions that accompany it? If so, what can you do to help yourself to let go and give yourself a break from the problem or issue you’re facing? It may go against what you think you should do but give it a try. Perhaps you could do something enjoyable instead like going out for a walk and being present with what is around you. Or each time you become aware that you’re thinking about the issue, acknowledge it and allow the thoughts to be there and emotions to be felt. Once you’ve given yourself some time to process it, go back to what you were doing before you became aware of your mind going over the problem or issue. You might be surprised at how things work themselves out or how you suddenly come up with an idea out of the blue that is the perfect solution to your problem…when you allow yourself to surrender to the unknown.